How to Own Your Mornings and Elevate Your Life

“You are never going to get to the next level of your leadership and impact if you’re terrified of who you were yesterday.”

In season 23, episode 1, we are joined by Robin Sharma.  He is the author of the best selling books, The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari and The 5 AM Club. His ideas and messages have transformed the lives of millions of leaders all over the world. You can follow him here.  


In this episode we cover:

  • Why SoulCycle is an excellent example of why you should turn up your resistance
  • How to tap into your greatness
  • Who is Robin’s Spellbinder
  • How to get to the center of humility
  • The four parts of the personal mastery equation
  • What is the 5 AM Club
  • Why our phones are costing us our fortune
  • What’s the 20/20/20 formula
  • What you can do if you aren’t a morning person
  • Why learning hits you right when you need it
  • How to handle criticism
  • Why it’s important, you put your light in the world
  • How you can influence without authority

5 Essential Strategies to Boost Your Confidence

Henry Ford famously said, “Whether you think you can or think you can’t, you are right.” 

Ford was talking about confidence. As his quote suggests, confidence is crucial for any type of success, especially in business. If confidence is so important, why do so many people struggle with it?

If you are going to build confidence, it starts with understanding exactly what confidence is and what it isn’t. It’s best described as the belief in one’s self and one’s ability to succeed. It comes from a Latin word meaning, “to have full trust.” 

Confidence is not cockiness or arrogance. It is not masking a hole inside by portraying something else on the outside. As I covered in a recent episode of the Follow My Lead Podcast, confidence is a genuine belief in yourself that comes from within, and it’s more crucial than ever.  

If you want to build your confidence each day, start by using these five strategies.

Visualize yourself at the top.

The mind is a powerful thing. Everything that has been achieved started as an idea in someone’s mind.

How you think will determine your future

The Journal of Consulting Psychology outlined an experimental study of visualization techniques and the results were pretty amazing. They studied two groups of job seekers. Both groups were exposed to the same career counseling and interview coaching, but the second group also learned visualization techniques. 

Within two months of training, there was a 45 percent increase in the second group getting employment versus the first group. Leaving no doubt about the power of visualization. 

If you want to grow your confidence, you have to visualize yourself at the top. Close your eyes and see it like it’s happening to you well before it actually does.  

Leverage specific kinds of affirmations. 

Confidence starts with the words you tell yourself every day. Affirmations are a great place to start. An affirmation is a formal declaration of emotional support or encouragement. 

While this is so important, any old affirmation isn’t good enough. Instead of telling yourself, “I am good enough” or “I am worthy enough,” add to the statement WHY you are good enough or WHY you are worthy. It would sound like this, “I am good enough because I have already hit rock bottom.” or “I am worthy of being a great leader because I care more about others’ success than my own.” 

Strengthen your words. 

While adding words of affirmation is a great place to start, you also must eliminate the words that protect you from failure (they’re setting you for it). Most people are afraid of failure. To cope, they try to soften the blow of failing by setting themselves up for the fall. 

They’ll say things like, “I am going to try…” or “I might be able to…”. Instead, replace those words with, courageous words like, “I am going to…” or “I will…” or “I can…”  

Always look for a positive.

If you look hard enough at anything you do, you can find something you could have done better. If that wasn’t enough, you could always find someone else who has achieved more, has more or won more. The opportunity to be negative and look for flaws is plentiful.  

There is nothing wrong with striving for more. But if you are working on building your confidence, you must always look for as many positives in each situation as possible. This reinforces to your mind that you are doing things well and moving in the correct direction even if the macro result isn’t what you want.  

Filter The Words of Others. 

As Lou Holtz said, “You’re never as good as everyone tells you when you win, and you’re never as bad as they say when you lose.” If you are reliant on gaining confidence from the words others say to you, you are in a dangerous spot.

Since you can’t control what others say, it’s important to take others’ words with a grain of salt. Remember, confidence comes from within so allowing others words to dictate how you feel isn’t real confidence.  

Confidence is crucial for both short-term and long-term success. Stop hoping or pretending you have it and put these fives moves into play starting today. 

What’s Your Leadership Style? Join over 40k leaders and discover how well you are leveraging love and discipline as a leader and find out your current leadership style for free.

Preorder the Book: Building the Best: 8 Proven Leadership Principles to Elevate Others to Success is being published by McGraw-Hill and is due out on November 15th. Preorder today and receive over $200 in gifts including the first two chapters immediately, Acts of Accountability Online Course, and a live webinar taught by John.

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About the Author John Eades is the CEO of LearnLoft, a leadership development company which exists to turn managers into leaders and create healthier places to work. John was named one of LinkedIn’s 2017 Top Voices in Management & Workplace and was awarded the 2017 Readership Award by Training Industry.com. John is also the host of the “Follow My Lead” Podcast, a show that transfers stories and best practices from today’s leaders to the leaders of tomorrow. You follow him on instagram @johngeades.

7 Wise Moves That Make the Relationships With Your Team Stronger

No one wants to go to work every day dreading the amount of time they are going to spend with his or her boss. At the same time, I don’t know any sane leader who looks forward to having bad relationships with team members. So the question then becomes, why are so many relationships between team members and their leader a major part of the reason people are unhappy at work?

The answer: Most leaders have the equation wrong.

The majority of leaders believe team members are responsible for the relationship with their leader. This belief puts the ownership of worthiness, trust, ability, respect, and work ethic on the shoulders of others.

The correct equation is:

Leaders are responsible for the relationship with each individual their team member.

In this drastically different approach, leaders know they are ultimately the ones responsible for building relationships based on trust, respect, work ethic, forgiveness, and accountability. These leaders model the behaviors they want to see, communicate well with their team, and allow their team members to choose to meet or exceed standards set. This doesn’t mean the relationship isn’t a two-way street, but it means the leader takes ownership and responsibility in it.

Knowing ownership and responsibility of work relationships starts with leaders, here are 7 wise moves you can leverage to strengthen those relationships:

Remove your ego

Ryan Holiday the author of Ego is The Enemy defines ego as “An unhealthy belief in our own importance. The Need to be better than, more than, recognized for far past any reasonable utility.” If this is you, your people won’t want to follow or work hard for you. It’s that simple. 

Cy Wakeman the author of No Ego said, “Ego puts a filter on the world that corrupts your relationship with reality.” If you can remove ego from the equation, you’ll remove barriers in your relationships with your team.

Focus on trust with each team member

When I ask, “Who is responsible for the bond of mutual trust between leader and team members?” in our Building the Best Leadership workshops, the overwhelming answer is “team members.”While I appreciate their courage to answer, they’re wrong.

Trust is built between the leader and team member by the actions and behavior of the leader, not the other way around. General Robert Calsen said on the Follow My Lead Podcast, “Trust is a built over time and it’s a byproduct of your competence and character.”

Focus on showing your people you are competent and you have high character and trust will blossom.

Be a good coach

One of the most important skills any leader can improve is their ability to coach people for growth. Unfortunately, most leaders don’t think of themselves as a coach but as a boss.

Michael Bungay Stanier says any leader could be a better coach just by, “staying curious a little bit longer and rushing to advice-giving a little bit slower.” While this is simple in theory it’s difficult in practice.

Start by getting in the habit of asking your people one of three questions when interacting:

  • Why did you do it this way?
  • How do you think we should do it?
  • How might you do it next time?

Put your phone away when interacting

No one likes to see someone else pick up their phone or check their phone in the middle of a conversation. When this happens, it makes us feel much less important than whatever is happening on the phone. 

If you are serious about having better relationships with your team members you can’t let your phone dictate your day. Get in a habit of taking your phone off the desk and out of sight during any conversation with a team member.

Embrace and leverage empathy

It’s easy for leaders to get in the habit of assuming every professional on their team is in the same place in their life’s journey. This is never the case. Just because a 40-year old and 30-year-old are doing the same job, they aren’t in the same place on their journey. 

Embrace and leverage empathy to put yourself in their shoes so you can act and make decisions differently. The whole point here is to think about the challenges each individual person might be facing so you can align with where they are in life.

Model what you want to see

If you only remember one thing, remember this. People watch everything a leader does whether the leader likes it or not. So the quickest way to improve the relationship with others is to model the behaviors you want to see so the level of mutual respect is higher. 

Be fanatical about the example you model because it’s what actions and behaviors you will get from your team.

Ask for feedback about how you’re doing

The number one competency-deficient area we have found in the Elevate Others 360° Assessment is asking for feedback. People want to feel like they are being heard and asking for feedback not only a great way to do this but it also helps the leader improve their self-awareness.

The action of asking for feedback in person, over email, or for a 360° assessment, will create a moment of vulnerability in front of your team that will instantly improve the relationship. One caveat, you must be humble when accepting feedback so you can change your habits and behaviors.

Join the Next Ultimate Leadership Academy Want to become a better leader? Apply to participate in the next Ultimate Leadership Academy. A virtual training program that includes, the EO 360° Assessment, live webinars, and one-on-one coaching. Learn more here.

About the Author John Eades is the CEO of LearnLoft, a leadership development company which exists to turn managers into leaders and create healthier places to work. John was named one of LinkedIn’s 2017 Top Voices in Management & Workplace and was awarded the 2017 Readership Award by Training Industry.com. John is also the author the upcoming book Building the Best: 8 Proven Leadership Principles to Elevate Others to Success and host of the “Follow My Lead” Podcast, a show that transfers stories and best practices from today’s leaders to the leaders of tomorrow. You follow him on Instagram @johngeades.

How Effective Leaders Strengthen Relationships with Their Team

No one wants to go to work every day dreading the amount of time they are going to spend with his or her boss. At the same time, I don’t know any sane leader who looks forward to having bad relationships with team members. So the question then becomes, why are so many relationships between team members and their leader a major part of the reason people are unhappy at work?

The answer: Most leaders have the equation wrong.

The majority of leaders believe team members are responsible for the relationship with their leader. This belief puts the ownership of worthiness, trust, ability, respect, and work ethic on the shoulders of others.

The correct equation is:

Leaders are responsible for the relationship with each individual their team member.

In this drastically different approach, leaders know they are ultimately the ones responsible for building relationships based on trust, respect, work ethic, forgiveness, and accountability. These leaders model the behaviors they want to see, communicate well with their team, and allow their team members to choose to meet or exceed standards set. This doesn’t mean the relationship isn’t a two-way street, but it means the leader takes ownership and responsibility in it.

Knowing ownership and responsibility of work relationships starts with leaders, here are 7 wise habits you can leverage to strengthen those relationships:

Remove your ego

Ryan Holiday the author of Ego is The Enemy defines ego as “An unhealthy belief in our own importance. The Need to be better than, more than, recognized for far past any reasonable utility.” If this is you, your people won’t want to follow or work hard for you. It’s that simple. Just this week, I had Cy Wakeman the author of No Ego on the Follow My Lead Podcast and she said, “Ego puts a filter on the world that corrupts your relationship with reality.” If you can remove ego from the equation, you’ll remove barriers in your relationships with your team.

Focus on trust with each team member

When I ask, “Who is responsible for the bond of mutual trust between leader and team members?” in our Welder Leader workshop, the overwhelming answer is “team members.” And they’re wrong. Trust is built between leader and team member by the actions and behavior of the leader, not the other way around. People will judge your trustworthiness by your character, expertise, and how well you share your expertise with each team member.

Be a good coach

One of the most important habits any leader can improve is their ability to coach individuals on their team. Michael Bungay Stanier says any leader could be a better coach just by, “staying curious a little bit longer and rushing to advice-giving a little bit slower.” Positivity impacts your relationship with your people by coaching them to improve a skill gap.

Put your phone away when interacting

No one likes to see someone else pick up their phone or check his or her phone in the middle of a conversation. When this happens, it makes us feel much less important than whatever is happening on the phone. I can only write this because I am guilty as charged and changing this habit is an ongoing challenge.

Embrace the journey for each team member

It’s easy for leaders to get in the habit of assuming every professional on their team is in the same place in their life’s journey. Just because a 40 and 30-year-old might be doing the same job doesn’t mean they are in the same place on their journey. One could be single, while the other married with kids. Those things absolutely matter. Get in the habit of putting yourself in the shoes of where your people are on their life’s walk.

Model what you want to see

If you only remember one thing, remember this. People watch everything a leader does whether the leader likes it or not. So the example you model is exactly what actions in behaviors you will get from your team.

Ask for feedback about yourself

The number one competency-deficient area we have found in the Welder Leader assessment is asking for feedback from their team. This is so important because when people feel like their opinion matters. The ability to be vulnerable in front of your team will instantly improve the relationship. One caveat, you must be humble when accepting feedback, rather than become defensive, or the act of asking for feedback puts your relationship at a deficit.

Welder Leader Webinar: Join John on a live Webinar October 17th at 11AM EST as he explores the surprising formula of effective leadership. Limited space available register here.

 

About the Author John Eades is the CEO of LearnLoft and host of the Follow My Lead Podcast. He is also the author of F.M.L. Standing Out & Being a Leader, and is passionate about the development of modern professionals. Follow him on Instagram @johngeades.

The Marks of a True Leader

“True Leaders don’t create followers, they create more leaders.”

On one hand its such a simple quote. On the other hand their isn’t a leader in the world that would say they have mastered it.  Behind this leadership quote is a lifetime of experience, effort, successes and failures. Many of us have falsely believed that the more followers we have, the more influential of a leader we become.  Unfortunately this type of approach doesn’t result in creating more leaders. So how do true leaders create more leaders? What does it take to help another person develop into a better, more educated, more well rounded version than yourself?

A small ego

I wrote about ego a couple weeks ago. Ego is defined as our self-centered, self-serving ambition. The desire to be more than, to be recognized for, or to be elevated above others.  It is literally impossible to help create more leaders if you are only concerned with your own self-serving ambition and have the need to be elevated above others.  Unfortunately, many of the praised leaders in modern times like Steve Jobs have been put on a pedestal for this type of approach.  The result: more young professionals with the mindset that leading is mostly about them and creating people underneath them that must fall in line.

An open-mind

A leader’s mind can be their greatest asset or biggest weakness.  David Ossip, the CEO of Ceridian who was highlighted in great piece in Forbes said, “If you have an organization that can’t change, it will become extinct.”

Mike “Coach K” Krzyzewski, Duke basketball coach is known as one of the best basketball coaches of all time. But what many may not know is over 20 of his former players and assistant coaches are now head coaches at colleges or in the professional ranks. If Coach K had a closed mind and kept all the talent to himself, he would have reached a much smaller number of people. Instead he created more leaders, and now his influence, values, and beliefs spread to 20+ programs and thousands of other people.

A humble heart

John Wooden said “Talent is god-given. Be humble. Fame is man given. Be grateful. Conceit is self-given. Be Careful”.  Without humility and being grounded in a leader’s heart, they have little to no chance to allow others to visually see it, feel it, and want to emulate it themselves.  I like to think of it as, if leaders aren’t humble what are they?

A purpose worth striving for

In next week’s episode of the Follow My Lead Podcast, Dee Ann Turner taught me a lot about how critical the purpose of Chick-Fil-A’s business was and is to it’s success. Their purpose has remained the same for 40 years, “To glorify God by being a faithful steward of all that is entrusted to us and to have a positive influence on all who come into contact with Chick-fil-A.” Want to know why Chick-Fil-A’s founder, Truett Cathy, created more leaders not more followers with this purpose?

“Nearly every moment of every day we have the opportunity to give something to someone else – our time, our love, our resources. I have always found more joy in giving when I did not expect anything in return.”  – Truett Cathy.  

Having a strong purpose for existing is one of the clearest and simplest ways to create more leaders in your organization. LearnLoft’s purpose is to “Teach modern professionals how to add value to their organization and the world.” What is yours?

A confidence that more talent is right around the corner

“I have observed that those who have accomplished the greatest results are those who, keep it under the body; are those who never grow excited or lose self-control, but are always calm, self possessed, patient, and polite.” – Booker T Washington. It would be impossible for leaders to stay calm under pressure, and exemplify what Booker T Washington describes if they don’t have confidence that more talent is right around the corner.  One of the biggest mistakes leaders make is holding people back for fear that they will never find someone as talented.

All these marks reference someone who is a living example of what professional relationships should be all about – helping others become the best version of themselves. When you do, you leave a legacy and  and your impact will live on well past your time in at an organization or in a bigger picture your time on this earth.

Online Leadership Programs. LearnLoft’s out of the box training approach to helping modern professionals learn how to add value to their organization and world. Find out more about ‘Getting Leadership Ready’, a program designed to help young professionals understand what leadership really is and how to stand out as a potential leader. Their brand new program ‘High Performance Leadership’ teaches the core principles of performance leadership and provides tools and techniques to drive accountability in teams.